This card is visually all over the map. Like way over, and not in a good way.

Where to start?

First there’s that crazy drop-shadow underneath the maroon swoosh. That must mean that maroon swoosh is like a good centimeter or more over paper. Drop shadows use to be all the rage, say 8 years ago as people were learning “photoshop” and InDesign and Quark added easy functions to make them…

Then there is the crazy bordered-photo. Is she selling cookies? It looks like one of those olden-time photos you’d see on cough drops or cookie or See’s Candies or something. Adnt he pink lab coat? It clashes with the maroon and the teal in the logo…

And why, if there’s a giant drop shadow on the swoosh is there not one on the photo above the swoosh? Does it exist outside the laws of physics? Apparently so.

Then there’s the EXIT realty logo. The word Exit doesn’t give me that safe, homey feel I want… and that picture of the giant complex is trying to convey what, exactly?

She gets points for having her phone number up top all prominent and stuff, then at the bottom it falls apart in a mix of Times New Roman bold and italics… The [R] realtor logo is on there twice, once on each side for good measure…

Anyway. This card gets a big fat D-.

I’m not sure making your hair “fade away” helps sell real estate.

I wanted to make fun of this card, but the more I’ve sat with it, the more I actually think it’s a good card.

Sure it’s modern and swooshy and feels like he couldn’t possibly be my realtor because I’m under 55, but it all kinda works.  He racks up the points with relatively few distractions.

The Pros:

• Main phone number listed prominently.
• His name is the URL for his company.
• His picture feels sincere.
• The parent real estate company’s logo is tastefully done (how it’s done with the white, not necessarily the logo itself.
• I don’t care for the fonts, or that there’s four of them, but it’s actually done okay.

The Cons:

• No email address.
• That CRS shield is a weird, mismatched color.
• He apparently owns a Bus where you can reach him by telephone.
• Could be confused with a political advertisement; Vote Pat!

Anyway… for picture-based cards, this one’s okay. I thought I’d really hate it, but in the end, it’s okay. Maybe I’m getting nicer as this goes on? Yikes.

The MLSonline.com logo is kinda a weird one, it evokes an old-school Realty-21 feel, but is clearly a new company. Why is the MLS underlined?

Do people outside of the real estate business really know what MLS means? I mean, sure some do, but is it a common, business-building name? Probably not. It sounds like an internet-company, but clearly it is a real realtor company, a traditional agent-based system (as oppose to RedFin or one of those other let’s-kill-the-realtors sort of plays).

Anyway, weird name for a business card with the picture of a real person on it.

And the slogan: All the homes you’re looking for, in one place.

My question: How man homes are people looking for?

Aren’t they in the market for just one? Not multiple ones. From the get-go this slogan lets you know you’re going to be in for a process that isn’t a lot of fun, you’re going to see a ton of houses that you’re looking for and you’re either a) not going to get it or b) have a wicked hard time deciding or c) there’s going to be multiple homes you want and they’ll all be on the same lot?!
Ascetically I might have gone with black instead of a continuation of the blue for all the title and numbers… I think that bright blue might be hard to read for some folks.

Anyway…  they get points for using the company name as the email address and listing the mobile number first.

I’ve been over Windermere’s general design before… it’s fine, if not dated.

But my question on this one is the job title — Sales and Marketing Specialist. My question is, are they an agent? It is ambiguous at best.

I’m sorry, Susan, this is not a business card.

I know deep in your heart you felt this was a great solution  to a simple problem—people want to know if you were just previewing or actually showing a qualified buyer.

So… WHY NOT PRINT IT ON YOUR CARD!

Well, for one, the lock box on the outside won’t magically read this checkbox. It will just record who you were and when you showed up. It won’t know.

And neither will most selling agents.

I mean, come on. Who are you doing this for? The agent who happens to get to the card stack before the homeowners do?

Anyway.

Apart from the weird fold-over-card-with-weird-intent, this card sucks all over the place otherwise.

It’s poorly typed, it has an awful photo, and it’s vertical.

CRS, GRI, Residential Marketing Specialist—who cares. Bad card.

I actually really like this card.

I like didi’s crazy smile. I like the crazy distorted “herron” graphic on the right that looks squished and very Apple II.

I like her picture. I do. The sorta white background works.

It’s got that classic Winderemere boringness, but man, Didi’s smile. It works.

I feel like looking at this card, she’d be like “oh, that’s such a bad picture of me,” and be really humble about it.

And she’ really excited not to be an agent, or an assocaite, but a real REALTOR®!!!!

Anyway. I think this card works for Didi.

4 STARS.

Okay… This card is pretty classic Business card.

The funniest part is the logo/name… VAN DORM!  It just sounds evil. And with the city in the background, it’s totally comic book.

And his name is Jake.

No, his name is probably Jeff or John or Jack or something…

But Jake?

Anyway…

The thing I really love about this card, is that the first number listed is business. I mean, his Cell phone? That’s for fun. Let’s get down to business.

And his email? Well,  whatever 2001!@aol.com is pretty rad. It gives a sense of optimism for the future. Oh, wait, you mean 2001? That was the past! Well, somebody gotta “you got mail” this guy and let him know.

*sigh*

This card is awful. It’s awful. I mean, sure, it says all and it’s a classic centered/then left-right justified bottom… but it’s just bad.

Luckily, it’s funny.

I’m going to take a leap here and assume that David is not an eagle, himself, and this is not his picture.

Instead, he appropriates the image of the Eagle to give a sense of freedom, or, to just feel “more American.” Of course, I’m not sure what the hell it has to do with buying a home, but, you know, go USA. Rah Rah Rah!

I guess if you’re going to name your company “American Eagle Realty” it makes sense to picture an eagle somehow… so, while it’s not a name I would have chosen, it does put the card in context.

Type wise, it’s just okay. His name is big, his direct number is first (he adds the office number, but, eh, I guess that’s okay). He uses the two color okay… and he puts his name in the same typeface as the company name, and the rest is all in Arial (of varying weights).

Now, front is funny to me, just because it is a flying eagle, but it’s not until we get to the back that all hell breaks loose:

It might be hard to pick up with my crappy scan, but if you look close, you’ll see a drop shadow on the eagle. That’s right, the eagle (who just happens to form the crossbar of the A, all dramtically and stuff) has a drop shadow… against the cloud. That would mean, if the normal laws of physics apply, that the clouds are flat and really really close to eagle.

And in this case, it would seem the sun is in two different places at once - bright enough to cause a dramatic drop shadow at the default PhotoShop and light the clouds from a different angle entirely.

Anyway… this really seems more like a business card for a mortgage company and not a real estate company. A mortgage company that markets itself to military families… oh wait, their logo is:

So, I was close.

So, two of my readers tell me they like it when I explain what the Acronyms mean.

I’ve covered GRI before, but this is the first card I’ve reviewed with ABR.

ABR stands for Accredited Buyer’s Agent, which in a nutshell means they’ve gone to extra classes to be the best buyer’s agent they can be.

The marketing language from the Realtor site is, as always, funny and full of hyperbole:

Buyer representation has truly become one of the most critical consumer issues and will grow more prevalent as we move into the new century.

Which translates to: We’ve come up with a new acronym you can put on your card, but only if you take a bunch of classes so we can get some money for you going to those classes.

This course covers the proper techniques and practices of buyer representation that will enhance your bottomline, review agency relationships, negotiation strategies, explain the advantages of buyer representation from the buyer’s, sellers, listing and selling broker’s perspectives and identify sources of buyer clients.

We’ll go over everything you already know, but do so using a different set of powerpoint slides.

But seriously, a good buyer’s agent is key, so I almost feel like ABR is more important than GRI, at least from a buyer’s perspective.

Oh, but I did have to share this little gem of a picture, it’s from the online ABR course:

“HI, I HAVE A TIE ON, AND WILL SHOW YOU ABOUT THE INTERNET.”

Visually, back to this card: It’s a classic Windermere, which means boring. I kind of feel like the little alien space ship on the right is an unnecessary embellishment, but that could be just the bad phone-cam picture.

In terms of picture, well, maybe it’s too close in on the face, but maybe it’s fine. I’ll leave that one up to you…